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Phone:  0277405549

E-mail: artyhelenknaggs@gmail.com

30 May 2024

The Barrier

The Barrier.

The simplest of titles bare the biggest stories. I am aware of its presence. I can not speak for others but only of my own.

I cried, and I could do that for the joy of it. A deep appreciation for the view and absolute beauty before us. This was the start to our school term arriving on Great Barrier Island. What a magnificent place we are staying in. The appreciation of bricks and mortar with all its mod cons. Nothing like my sheds of previous accommodation. But this view.

After a few days of settling in, school started. Drew (daughter) feeling the excitement and nerves as she set off for the school bus stop. Me (Mumma Bear) wanted to walk with her. “Mum! I don’t want to be teased on the first day”. So, I stayed home and recorded the bravery with a kind of proud you want to bottle and keep forever.

I procrastinated that morning. A harsh diary observation. Of course, I wanted to just be in these first few hours. It has only taken 11 years to get back to this. Even the breakfast preparation felt ceremonial in its steps.

And then I got there, like a prisoner free. I got there, to the beach in my newfound skin.

It hit my chest like life’s first breath. I could breathe. Had I been holding my breath for that long?

Step by step feeling the sun on my face I began to cry like a baby, actually I wailed. Ugly, astounding and then calming tears.

Funny how a rock can ground you, memory rock.

I had promised myself that I would be back. I will be back soon. I would like to come back soon.

I am back.

 

This would not be complete without some art talk and to share with you my creative processors. It has taken many years to still do my creative talk internally. Now I let my mind wander so far and even visualise the final exhibition and how the series of work would look and then I let it go.

At the end of my first beach walk I noted a series of work that I felt inspired to explore: A new canvas inspired to do tokens of colour. I see landscape or surf or all my world ahead of me and instead of black lines a washed-out white line showing the pigments of under coats seeping through.

Softer light, lightly lines.